For immediate release: Your straw diameter sucks

February 24, 2010 – 1:28 pm

Dear local restaurant,

Stop treating your thirsty customers like shit.  Saving 40 cents on 1000 straws is no way to run a business.

Thin straws are terrible.  They make the soft-drink super fizzy.  How could it be any other way, after such a violent ascent to my mouth?

Dr. Pepper, coke or sprite?  Who knows….because of this dumbass straw it just tastes like pressurized seltzer water.

Do yourself a favor.  Go to your local McDonalds….order a large drink.  Take a sip from the straw.  I guarantee you it will be the tastiest soft-drink you’ve had in a long time.

Why?

Thick straw diameter.  Natural flow of liquid and an appropriate level of carbonation stimulation.

It’s the little things that matter.

Get your act together, buddy.

Sincerely,

Those Who Appreciate Quality

  • Ha - read this and cracked up. I have felt the same way sometimes but never taken the time to write them a letter :)
  • BobSwan
    Yes, as that old sage, my Army boot camp Drill Instructor said, "Take care of the little things, and the big things will take care of themselves." I think he was referring to polishing boots, but I think it applies to customer care!
  • debrink
    If you are drinking through a straw, than I am sorry to say, you do not appreciate quality.
  • Lol that's pretty good.....but, unfortunately I must often drive-thru.
  • Next time you're in NYC Andy (or somewhere else you can get this), try getting a bubble tea. You'll like the large-gauge straws.

    Agreed on the importance of the right straws generally though. The worst is when you order soda in a restaurant that tries to be fancy and serves it to you in a short glass with a couple of cocktail straws in it. I hate that. Then you get the bill and find they dinged you for $3 for that offense.
  • Indeed
  • Amen! Mickey D's has the best straws... but so does Panera! Check it... http://sandwichloversclub.files.wordpress.com/2...
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